Sleeping Around

I have to say, as much as I love traveling, this whole college roadshow experience has made me glad I don't do this full-time. All the time being away from home and the office starts to add up. The upside to traveling to wretched college towns is, of course, wretched hotels. A few notes from the road:

Holiday Inn Express, Madison, Wis.: The winner of the coveted "Editor's Pick" for most habitable hotel., Holiday Inn Express offers cinnamon-scented shampoo, an ironing board and a scrumptious continental breakfast. Two thumbs up!

Ramada Limited, Champaign, Ill.: When they say "limited" they aren't kidding - this place is a shell of a Ramada, which isn't much of a hotel to begin with. Thin curtains (on my second stay, I actually brought some tape and taped the two curtains together, to block out the daylight), moldy air conditioners and a little note that reminds you if you want clean sheets, please call the front desk.

Edge of Night Motel, Antigo, Wis.: This one takes the cake. In 24 (almost 25) years, I've never actually stayed in a hotel with a Magic Fingers vibrating bed. It's not as spectacular as TV would have you believe - the vibrating is actually pretty slight (of course I tried it out.) Other amenities include a swimming pool with a charming green algae motif, dark brown shag carpeting that feels like yarn, and - I hope you're taking notes, Mr. Zagat - COLOR TV. Which is prominently advertised on the hotel's marquee.

Next up - a third (!) visit to the Ramada Limited Champaign, followed by a stint at the fabulous Comfort Inn Knoxville West. I've heard the Comfort Inn gives you a shower cap. Stay tuned.